Breaking The Rules

Breaking The Rules

Something I didn't mention in my last blog. I had told you that the security guard had warned me about setting off the alarm, so I took extra precautions, which entailed buying a whole new outfit that was foolproof. Jen knew the exact bra to buy at Safford's amazing mall, Walmart. She swore to me that it's never set the alarm off. So here I was, Sunday morning, in my 4" stripper shoes, a new dress and my new bra. I had it covered. As I walked through security, I was thinking how I had done what the guard asked me and I felt pretty good. That's when I heard the beep.

WHAT?!

I looked at Grumpy, who was later renamed "white devil". Was she going to be nice? Nope. She took one look at me and started going off about how she had warned me yesterday. I tried to reason with her, telling her I had done absolutely everything in my power to make sure the stupid metal detecter didn't go off, but still managed to fail. Nope. Go to the back of the line.

That's when I started to cry. I was so tired and frustrated. Who makes these rules? And who says it's okay to change them? What frustrated me the day before, was that during both weekends in the past I had been allowed through with the very same clothing and bra, so why now is it suddenly different. I walked back through the metal detector, feeling defeated. She did tell me that I'd be in before "count", which is at ten. So worst case scenario, I had to wait an hour and a half. That broke my heart a little. There was no way for me to tell Eric where I was or what was happening. I looked at Jen, who had made it through and she was trying to go tell me to take my bra off, but I didn't understand, so I went to the farthest corner, away from security and cried some more. If there is one thing I could change about myself, it's these tears. Stupid tears.

This is when a miracle happened. My beautiful friend from Compton went through security, and she beeped. Back of the line for her too. She's not a weak baby deer, like me, she's more of a ferocious mountain lion and she immediately demanded that they call in the lieutenant. She wasn't backing down and as she came back through security, she grabbed me and said, "come on, we are going to our cars." She was pissed. If I've learned one thing in these few short weeks that I've known her, it's that you do not want to make her mad. I'm glad to say that she is my friend, thank god, and I've pleaded with Eric to not ever make her husband mad (again....?) because I really need her out here, on my side, for backup during these "security issues" (I have a feeling this isn't the first or last time something shitty will be happening while going through security).

Okay. At this point, I do as I'm told. These girls know what they are up against, while poor little Montana is so clueless on to how to react. We get to our cars and she tells me to take my bra off. The idea of walking around, in public, without a bra, is a little scary for me, but at this point, I guess I really had no choice, so I went ahead and took her advice. We walked back into the building and Compton goes straight up to security, where there was now a female lieutenant, and insists she be able to walk back through. The lieutenant allows both of us through, this time neither of us beeping. I'm not sure if Compton's intimidating height of 6' 2" (plus heels), or the fact that she didn't really ask, she demanded we be allowed to go back through, or perhaps maybe both of these things helped us, but I am SOOOOOO grateful that she was there to show me what to do. I would have stood in that corner feeling sorry for myself, probably forming a small puddle on the floor from my crocodile tears. Some other advice she gave me was not to cry, because that's exactly what they want, and they don't want us to want to come back. I guess I need to grow a backbone. When we didn't beep, Grumpy looked at us, completely shocked, "did you change?" she asked. I wanted to be a smart ass and tell her, yes, I was so upset five minutes ago that I completely forgot that I had another bra in the car......

We aren't allowed to go braless in visit.....

shhhhhhh......don't tell anyone.